>Oh man, oh man, oh man..
Its amazing what a weird, weird life it is. One minute it all looks roses and the next it upends itself and life smacks you silly!
Now before anyone thinks Im in a downer frame – dont.
Actually quite the opposite. Now my situation isnt exactly unique or special, happens to people all over the world all the time: Im trying and struggling to do the thing that I love to do more than anything, but to be able to survive to keep doing it, I need to do things/jobs that I find soul crushing in many respects and feel like Im going against my very nature by doing them.
As my luck would have it, Im smart basically and so can do what Im asked to, doesnt in any way make me like it any better. Ok maybe makes it less annoying. And so this is me, trying to work a 9-6/7/8 job 6 days of the week for good pay (so I can support myself in the shabby, simplistic style to which I have become accustomed :D) and then coming home to work on my comic book (takes a JLo butt-load more effort then anyone realises by the way!) and all the while worrying about whats gonna happen with the book Ive already got in the wings.
Now being an idiot who cant help but have a gazillion ideas a minute makes life fun, but its can be a problem when my boss is talking to me about prices of Phenyl-Glycene and Caustic Soda and Im looking at him and his some stray thought suddenly has my mind go off on this tangent where Im in a fantasy land watching a period drama unfold – with my own slightly skewed perspective thrown in for good measure :P…
Dont know how many of you saw that movie, but theres this scene in an old Nicole Kidman movie where shes a weather girl and her husband is lecturing her and the camera moves to her p.o.v. and you see him and this little black circle forms around the edges and starts to shrink – like in some cartoons, only slower – until hes in this tiny black circle waaaayyy in the distance and you cant hear what he’s saying or anything. Thats something I never forgot cos as described earlier, that kinda thing happens to me fairly often, specially if youre boring me or something to that effect.
Anyhow!!! Im again running on without thought, so what I was getting at way back in the beginning of this ludicrous post was that Ive always taken life for what it is and being a staunch humanist (thats my philosophy – religion if you need that classification – look it up!), Ive always believed in the idea that life is what it is and our lives are what we make of them. Kinda like the whole “if life gives you lemons bit..
And in my current state, when I said life smacks you, I decided that instead of getting lost and disoriented as often happens in those times, its time for a change. So it was decided to take that smack and return one of my own, kinda like in those olden times when youre insulted and then smack someone with a glove and say in a cheesy french accent, “I challenge you, to a duel!”
This next clip is the title track for my all time favourite series (EVER!!) and if youd be kind enough to listen to the lyrics you’d maybe see why I tend to connect to it. Or not. For those of you that have been with me awhile, you’ve seen allusions to this show in pics and stuff (including the little picture on the left), for the rest – your loss. This ones called “The Ballad of Serenity”
>Oh the eternal ‘how to be happy with selling my soul to make my dreams come true’ dilemma. Hang in there, it shall get better 😛 until then, music and movies provides welcome solace…
>i have nothing useful to sayI am out of wordssniff
>@serendipityyeah, i know – its the idea that someday in some way it will get better that keeps me going day to day. That and a lot of good books, music and movies to keep my wandering mind from getting bogged down completely!@ankiim sure you do, its just a slump. worry not lil anki, as SIM has simply put already, these are periods in life that will pass sooner or later..
>Ah, the ballad of serenity, it is balm to my ears. Makes me think of my favourite quote from Jayne – Do you know what the chain o’command is? It’s the big chain I go get and beat you with.
>yeah, that show was and still remains something special to me.. I am a browncoat now and always, and fan-boyism apart, in principle and such is where it appeals to me most – particularly mal.my fav quote is snippet of mal and simons chat at the end of the pilot (the last line here being key!), and yes, jayne is withough question one of the best things on that show! (though id be hard pressed to make a list of what is good in order cos it all rules:Simon: Are you always this sentimental?Mal: I had a good day.Simon: You had the Alliance on you, criminals and savages… half the people on the ship have been shot or wounded including yourself, and you’re harboring known fugitives.Mal: We’re still flying.Simon: That’s not much.Mal: It’s enough.