>You know you’re a pothead when…

>This is for all the little potheads and stoners out there:

You think the song “Hits from the Bong” by Cypress Hill should replace the national anthem.

Your music collection is worth more than your car/bike.

Your bong is taller than your dog.

It takes you more than 30 minutes to roll a joint.

You set your wedding date for 4/20.

You take off April 20th every year and treat it as a holiday.

You spent your last bit of money to score some bud and don’t have enough fuel money to get home, but you don’t care.

You start every sentence with, “uhhh!”

You intentionally roll seeds into your joints on independence day so you can hear the popping because you don’t have enough money, energy or the inclination to buy fireworks.

You eat at Wendy’s/White Castle/Taco Bell at least 8 times a week.

You wear sunglasses at night, and actually see better.

You go to the corner store and the clerk automatically tosses a pack of rolling papers and some smokes on the counter.

Your pot tray is more full than your refrigerator.

Your bong gets washed more than your dishes.

You sold your car for fuel money.

You are the only smoker in the room, you look at the cigarette in the ashtray and ask, “Is that mine?”


You’re eating something on your way home, while thinking about what you’re gonna eat when you get home!

Every cylindrical object you see, turns into a plan for a new smoking device…

Just to be religious, you observe 4:20 in every time zone.

Someone has come up to you on the street and said “Hi.” and you’ve replied “Yep!”

You think being stoned to death would be a damn good way to go out. 🙂

You have smoked pot before 8 o’clock in the morning.

You actually get these jokes and want to copy and pass them on to your other pothead friends.


Cheers folks and happy puffing! 😉
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21 Comments Add yours

  1. >hee hee hahaha. Where in the hell did you get this..I like! Although it doesn’t take me that long to roll one, thank god for that 🙂 food or maal.that is the eternal question. Mwaaah!

  2. The Dude says:

    >Some are my own, others I got from fellow stoners.. such things tend to travel well by word of mouth! Glad you liked, and I dont really take 30 minutes myself either, but it has been known to happen! :DAnd that my dear is a question for the ages, not for simple souls like ourselves. Mayhap someday someone will finally have an answer…

  3. Blue'd says:

    >erm some of those are true for me even otherwise.

  4. Div Rathore says:

    >isn’t it supposed to be- Picture of Dorian Gray. i’m referring to fav books in ur profile page.

  5. clemenza says:

    >hey, nice blog!!!On topic,30 minutes for a doobie?Any stoner worth his seeds can surely do it in a minute or less !!the 420 holiday, It was a holiday this year !

  6. serendipity says:

    >For the umpteenth time, I feel like I am in an alternate universe surrounded by people who speak an alien language that I can decipher a few words of but can never quite figure out… As someone who isn’t a ‘pothead’ or ‘stoner’ in a profession where I’m surrounded by a majority who are and in a city which prides itself for ‘maal’ that starts at 50 a piece and goes up to obscene amounts… I can’t relate to the instances but me like the humour of it 🙂

  7. The Dude says:

    >@anki:what? did i say somethin wrong? is it m breath?@blue’d:well, thats the luck o the draw eh?@div rathore:i think you may be right, ill check it and fix if it is. gracias.@clemenzaThanks!! glad you like it! :)”Any stoner worth his seeds can surely do it in a minute or less”I like to think that you could do it in mere minuted, but a true stoner takes the time to not just roll a doob, but to craft a masterpiece of puffage! @serendipityaw, you dont have to feel all left out and stuff! we’re a very easy going and chilled people, you want to smoke or not, its all ok – we dont judge!and btw, this city may pride itself on a lot of things, but good maal should not be it considering the garbage ive seen and the prices that make your balls jump back inwards! (sorry for that graphic detail, but needed to make the point!)Im glad you liked the humour, it proves you might not smoke, but theres a little happy stoner in you naturally! Good for you! :DCheers..

  8. >but a true stoner takes the time to not just roll a doob, but to craft a masterpiece of puffage! arre you are too cool. Respect!

  9. utopia says:

    >i quite suck at rolling and crushing too seems to be too tedious. and naaa i don’t do it regularly but when i do tis good fun. i ain’t the quintessential stoner but yeah sometimes i flyyyyy and darn tis someeee ride haha! this one time i made a bong and got my friend’s older brother stoned out of his skull. he didn’t know what hit him. he refused to believe i was 7 years younger than him heheh!

  10. The Dude says:

    >@lostlittlegirlthanks, i try not to but kya kare.. :D@utopiahaha! sounds like my kind of stoner story! getting people stoned is funny, specially when theyre older and “more wordly” and all that! yeah, it can be a bit tedious, but its fun – i enjoy the almost ritual like nature of the process and the happiness that people get out of it when we blaze. its the closest i come to religious habits! 😀 ;Dalso, refer to my earlier answer to clemenza..cheers..

  11. Div Rathore says:

    >nothing new from u of late?

  12. The Dude says:

    >yeah, been busy but have something Ive been meaning to post on. Will def post during this week sometime, so stay tuned for our next thrilling post! Same dude style, same dude blog!!

  13. mystic rose says:

    >hmmm… that’s nice music.have you tried different players? this particular one has some problem… you could also try searching within odeo itself for code that autoplays.Its a simple step.. just insert &autoplay=1 next to the url of the song.

  14. The Dude says:

    >thanks rose, will try that.

  15. iz says:

    >Ummm and what about us starightlaced, non-bonging types who get paranoia everytime they are within second hand weed distance? What do we sing? Doris Day?

  16. Pinku says:

    >wow!!!thats was super cool….I dont smoke but going by the account u have given looks like I am really missing out on something!

  17. The Dude says:

    >Well for starters, try a little to not get paranoid and remember that even if someone gives you a blood test the day after, if you aint smoking, you aint culpable! :Dand in regard to your query, its not a hard and fast rule, just a generality, youre free and most welcome to sing whatever you like. (provided of course you have a nice singing voice – if not we will need to be drunk as well to appreciate it!) :)Cheers.

  18. The Dude says:

    >@pinkuIm glad you enjoyed reading this, and im a smoker and a fan, so ill honestly tell you this – if you are new to it, do it only with people youre genuinely comfortable with in an easy, chilled place and only if you really WANT to. You do it under pressure or in a stressful setting and you become paranoid like iz! 😀 (just teasin iz!)

  19. Renovatio says:

    >Now here I just can’t relate. I’ve never taken a puff of anything in my life, and the closest I’ve been to getting high (so I was told later) was when I drank some red bull after a few paracetamols. I was hallucinating in Hookah.Been a while, but now I’m here and I expect reading material. Update!

  20. priya says:

    >hey check out by blog:its has more on you know you are a pot head:http://www.youknowster.com/jokes/view/374-you-know-you-are-a-pothead-when

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