The Briefcase and The Miniskirt

And so it is that we complete another year!

Another trip around the ol’ “great ball of fire” in the sky!

Another year survived, another year older.

Are we any the wiser? Better? More enlightened?

Perhaps. But as events around the world show us, sadly in many cases perhaps not.

But that is the way things evolve, some things change, others don’t and so the friction carries on until the old makes way for the new – and though it may resist for long, it usually does so, sooner or later.

One should take that as hope that sooner or later we’ll have a better world.

Will I see it? Don’t know, but me being me, I remain hopeful that at the very least I’ll see at least all the glimmers of it on the horizon, some of which are already there.

In the meantime, something a little lighter to bring in the new years first post, no heavy pontificating or lecturing to be had here (besides le petit one above!). Here’s a series of funny takes on the same situation playing on cultural stereotypes – now I figure you can take these in the spirit of a good laugh in which they are presented or feel I’m being insensitive (as happens) but in the end know that all I’m going for is a bit of a laugh, something to lighten the start of your week and the early days of a new year.

And so, we begin the story of the briefcase and the miniskirt:

Tokyo, Japan

A man was walking past a young girl, when a jagged edge of his briefcase accidentally tore her miniskirt. Before the man could apologize, the girl bowed deeply, and said, “I humbly apologize for this error. The quality of my skirt is not good.” Then she took out a pin, put the skirt back together and left.

New York, USA

A man was walking past a young girl, when a jagged edge of his briefcase accidentally tore her miniskirt. Before the man could react, the woman pulled out a business card and gave it to him saying, “This is my lawyer’s card. He will contact you about this sexual harassment matter. See you in court, buddy!”

Shanghai, China

A man was walking past a young girl, when a jagged edge of his briefcase accidentally tore her miniskirt. Before the man could say anything, the police came and took him away to labour camp

London, England

A man was walking past a young girl, when a jagged edge of his briefcase accidentally tore her miniskirt. Before the man could react, the girl quickly covered the torn spot with a newspaper, and said with a blush on her face, “Do you mind taking me home, sir? I live not far away.” The Englishman took his jacket off, put it on her, called a cab and took her home safely.

New Delhi, India

A man was walking past a young girl, when a jagged edge of his briefcase accidentally tore her miniskirt. Before the man could apologize, Arnab Goswami was on Times Now TV, yelling, “Times Now is the first TV channel to bring you this outrageous event.This is a Times Now exclusive. We assure you, we shall track this sordid story to the very end. The nation is watching! The PM must answer!”

In the meantime, AAP files a PIL against men carrying briefcases and BJP files a PIL against women wearing miniskirts. Congress ignores man and woman and keeps accusing AAP & BJP of encouraging crimes against women.

In U.P., one community accuses the other of sexual harassment & a communal riot ensues. In Bengal, the crowd beats up the man with his briefcase, unless, of course he belongs to the Trinamool Congress, in which case they beat up the woman. In Mumbai, both go their own way cursing the crowds. In Goa, the Chief Minister announces a ban on Miniskirts.

Paris, France

A man was walking past a young girl, when a jagged edge of his briefcase accidentally tore her miniskirt. Before the man could react, the girl murmured with a smile, “A red rose can best convey your apology, monsieur.” The Frenchman bought her a rose, and then they went to a nearby cafe, drank some wine, and retired to a discreet little hotel for the rest of the afternoon.

Sydney, Australia

A man was walking past a young girl, when a jagged edge of his briefcase accidentally tore her miniskirt. Before the man could apologize, the girl turned around, took out a hunting knife, ripped the side of his trousers and said; “OK, now we’re even, mate”, and then they both went off to down a few pints of amber nectar together.