So… WB got forced to release their Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice trailer ahead of schedule it seems, after a teaser was leaked and went viral – better to get ahead of it I suppose, get a good quality one out there instead of some grainy one that will make your movie look bad. Sure, that’ll do it.
I’ve been keeping expectations low, but to be honest this movie I’ve previously assumed, is going to be nicely stylised and well made but with a story that will likely make me want to stick an ice-pick into my ear and silence my brains groans of annoyance – mostly because that’s what WB and DC‘s movie section seems to be doing time and again.
BUT! I decided to be fair, not be an asshole about it and instead give it a fair look – so I sat back, put the youtube video above on full-screen, with headphones on and in nice, high quality so I could get the most out of it and maybe, just maybe, actually be impressed or see hope re-kindled.
This what I got from watching this trailer:
- Supermans doing superman-y things and saving the day left and right.
- People are turning him into Jesus 2.0.
- Supes’ sad about it but somehow seems unable to get them to stop, they even have a statue for some reason, which he could have easily objected to or tossed into the ocean to prove his point and said “I’m not god, stop this shit. Stop it. Now.”
- Lex Zuckerberg (shudder) is grumpy because for some reason he’s all religious and believes demons come from the heavens and not from hell below us (John Lennon would be sad for Lex) and we’ll probably barely see him at all in the whole movie anyway, teasing him as the main bad for the actual SUPERMAN sequel.
- Bruce Wayne is grouchy and seems to agree with Lex because there’s no indication of why he’s going after a guy who’s done nothing but good things – except a creepy voice-over that seems to imply that Batman/Bruce is actually an a**hole because of “the fever, the rage, the feeling of powerlessness that turns good men cruel” – So basically they’ve merged comic book Lex and Bruce? He’s jealous of Superman because post retirement or in his twilight years he’s feeling less cool/badass/awesome? Frak you Bruce, frak you…
- He then proceeds to blow some shit up for utterly unclear reasons and cause some major ruckus – until he finally gets Supermans attention and then hits him with some of the shittiest tough-guy dialogue ever written. So basically Batmans got villain motivation now?
- Also – No sign of anyone else that was cast like Wonder Woman or Aquaman, not even a 1/2 second glimpse to explain their existence in this movie.
- And then of course the now customary Nolan-esque “BWAAAAA”-ish sound-effects, lots of dark… well, everything… and that’s your movie!
I would honestly be at least somewhat surprised and it would be a great sign if literally EVERYTHING from this trailer is actually just the first 20-30 minutes of the movie and after they fight, they dust off, WW and AM show up and they loosely form a Justice League and go after the real bad guys.
That movie I might actually watch!
…also, The Tumbler and the Keaton-era Batmobiles are still cooler. By far.
Thank you Comic Gods, for at least having Arrow and Flash, at least something from DC’s live-action universe is worth watching and now more than ever, I’m happy the movie and TV verse shall not be merging. It’s the greatest of blessings. Gotham is unfortunately a shit show – do no like, at all. Except Donal Logue as Bullock, best most-wasted casting ever.
Would have been awesome if they could learn from the success of TDK and their TV shows and realise that you don’t HAVE to go in these dark/gritty/”real” and other bullshit directions to make a good movie – learn from the source material, make a good, entertaining story that plays to the strengths of the characters and the world you are interpreting and not pandering to Hollywood blockbuster shite.
Sad, but what can you do. Well, I’m done with the DC movie-verse, you are entitled to agree or disagree with me as you see fit – I’m going to continue to enjoy what few good TV shows they make, while they make them and get my movie magic from Marvel.